Weekend Adventures

So, for the first time since I went to Houston ... I got drunk. A wily weekend adventure that begins with a good ol' fashion Hockey Game ... yes, we lost ... lets not dwell on that.

Moving along ....

How many table kegs does it take to make 3 people drunk? One for Jill (she only had a few pints) ... But these things were a marvel. Les and I went through two before we called it a night ... and yes, I had more out of it because Les decided to be a weakling.

One hundred and twenty eight beautiful ounces of Alexander Keiths ... now, I pose a question to you all. When a waitress brings you something the size of a over-compensating blender with a small spout on it ... Am I the only one who wants to pull a Barney Gumble and just open up that spout and suck it all back?

(Yes, it may not be Strongbow ...)

One of these days ... when I meet up with my beloved Jill ... I'm just going to wear a microphone when we get together. We tend to have the most interesting converstations ... or more like bitch fests ... even down to the point where we slapping each other at the bar.

Always a good time ... even when we spend the next morning watching Avenger movies.

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Random Thoughts

Going with the bumper sticker I saw ... I wonder if my dad would let me put a 'My other vehicle is a Smart car' ... on his peterbuilt dump truck.

Why do lesbians get to have strap-ons and dildos ... ? They made their choice ... Why do they get to have the best of both worlds? Men get laughed at when they try to buy sex ... get what they want without all the drama ...

How fine is the line between personal trainer and dominatrix? I've had this converstation with my former trainer before ... I don't really think there is much of a line ... We (client) pay them (trainer) to make us sweat and feel pain (Starts as a burn ... but the next day you're in the bathtub full of Deep Cold) ... and we have to listen to their demands and obey them ... Well, okay, we can just walk away ... but then we don't get what we came for (Just like if it was a Dom ... not a Trainer).

Why is it called an Italian Soda? What's so damned Italian about it? Its not made of pasta ... its sugar syrup in soda water and ice! What's Italian about that?!

Am I the only one who will be going on a murderous rampage after hearing 'There's another brick in the Boulin wall'  .... ? (Perhaps to keep myself out of jail ... I'll just turn it into a drinking game)

Why the hell are you still reading this? Go to the chive or something ... good lord, I'm not -that- interesting ...

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Okay! Who ate my Volcano Taco?

Hell if I know!? I'm not even allowed to eat those kinds of food anymore.


Yes, I know I still do ... just not as often! Anyways, that's not why I'm here wasting both of our times right now.


Zombieland. If you haven't seen it ... in the popular words of practically all my friends 'What the hell is wrong with you?


Simply put, it was hilarious. Although Jessie Eisenberg reminds me wwwaaayyyy too much of the whiney Shea LeBouf and Michael Cera. Although, the well placed rules at random times quickly made up for it.


That and Woody Harrelson. The man is a genius ... plus Emma Stone was nice on the eyes ...


Now, I got introduced to a new website ... www.fupenguin.com ... nothing too special about this website. But, its just worth a good chuckle. All this guy does is take cute pictures of animals and tear strips off of them. Give it a peek.


Oh! Big news ... I finally bought a laptop! A nice, shiney, MacBook Pro. This thing is sweet. Now I can go sit in coffee shops drinking water and pretending to be all smart and judgemental on all you other poor suckers who don't have a MacBook Pro.


Knowing my luck ... someone will actually call me on my bluff and then I'll look like an idiot ... but its not like that'll be new.


I kicked an inflatable ball practically into someone's face at the gym on Wednesday. Ofcourse, my trainer laughed as I tried quickly to appease the annoyed man who looked like he could kick my ass with just his pinky finger.


Now, back to the Oiler's game ... GO OIL GO ...


Stupid Calgary ....

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