2012 - Death by Irony

Verdict: RENT

Unless you want to spend money to see Woody Harrelson be one underwear-only attire scene away from being strapped into a self-love jacket and left to bounce around in a rubber room while watching Hanna Montanna or some other cruel form of visual punishment.

Not to say there wasn't beautiful irony in the movie ... plus, something I'm sure that alot of Directors have longed to do in a movie but feared for the backlash of it.

I'll give Roland Emmerich credit ... watching the Vatican get completely, and utterly, destroyed was a sight. No, I'm not a catholic hating bastard. I find all religion mostly useless, however we aren't here to discuss that.

But yes, the Vatican gets a good 8 minutes to show its destruction and the death of all the people worshipping. I'm sure Roland has gotten a few love letters over that.

My favorite ironic movie in the movie ... is the death of the US President (yes, he's black in the movie ... played by Danny Glover). The President of the US in the movie is killed by a aircraft carrier. The name of that carrier? The USS John F. Kennedy.

Just writes itself, doesn't it?

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NERDRAGE!

Okay. First things first ... The new Hot 107.1 ... this new radio station does nothing but bash The Bounce. That's all fine.

'We play more music then the bounce...'

'Hear the new music now or wait 2 months for the Bounce to play it'

Big freaking deal ... I've been listening to the radio station for the last few days ...

I thought The Bear was bad for repetition. Holy jesus christ. Yes, we all know that with the Bear you'll hear a AC/DC song atleast once an hour.

I heard the same damn song 6 times on 107.1 ... today ... yes, today ... on my drive out to Ft. Saskchewan and back. Yes, its nice that they play the new hit songs ... but holy crap. Keep playing songs like that and they won't be the new hit songs for much longer.

I do like the whole 'The Bounce is my mom's music' ... Hey, a mom that even listens to that kind of music is good enough. Better then listening to that country crap.

Now, a lesser ... and more irritating thing to cross my ears ...

Calmar has its own radio station now. Calmar has the population of about 2,500. The station is also run out of the Calmar Hotel.

Anyone who has been to the Calmar Hotel ... its not the most attractive place ... they claim it has undergone renovations ... so it might be better now. But the bar I remember ... reminds me of a musky old saloon with a pool table that has more stains then pool balls.

Now, its not the whole 'Calmar Radio Station' that has me going ... WTF Genius ... its the name.

Leduc Radio .... LEDUC FUCKING RADIO?! In Calmar?!

Did I wake up from another drunken stupor ... why the hell would LEDUC RADIO be in Calmar? Why not go open a bakery shop in Thorsby and call it Beaumont Bakery?! Also have the whole staff of said bakery speak only french ... just to really be a dick.

Doesn't make any sense ... then again ... Intelligence has gone the way of Common Sense ... some people ... they are just special with a captial R...

Right Sav?

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The Men Who Stare at Goats

So, I went to go see this movie with this girl that seems to be somewhat normal. But, she's not the topic of this post ... if you couldn't guess by the title.

I had high hopes for The Men Who Stare at Goats. Unfortunately, like a double mocha cappuchino latte, no foam extra skinny (Which I later found out is similar to espresso ... but also compared to doing the kama sutra and stopping before the orgasm ... which is funny in its own right), I was left with a feeling of something being missed.

Now, don't get me wrong ... alot of the movie showed the big name actors under the influence of LSD. That brings quite the amount of slap-stick and situational humor.

I wasn't expecting too much of a story line ... given the far-fetched topic of the movie. But, when the end came around ... both my date and I were left with the feeling of ... 'that's it?' ... like we got the reach around but no dinner before hand ... left thinking something was missing.

So, with that in mind ... lets talk about the funny parts.

Jeff Bridges as a hippie and an avid LSD user made for some good laughs while we explored his transendance to creating the 'New Earth Army' that is the corner-stone of super-soliders.

While everyone was hilarious in their own rights ... Kevin Spacey really made the movie for me. (Although the creepy child molester smile from the Brigadier General was a close second)

Nothing like watching Kevin Spacey have the facial expression like he's taking a constipated crap while strung out on LSD staring at a little spider on his hand ... or where the tension is broken at the supposed climax by a aptly placed ...

'Wow, I'm hungry' then Kevin Spacey walks away.

I'm going to consider this a disappointment. However, my date and I did find a few others movies that we are probably going to see in the future ... so, it wasn't a complete waste of time.

Time to go find something more productive to do.

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